(Post 4) – Bon voyage

Inside Dover Port
    After leaving you guys at the Internet café yesterday evening I mounted my stolen bike and headed east away from the setting sun, back towards that Bed and breakfast.  I had to stop to fill up with petrol and reluctantly paid the £10 for it. When I got to the bnb I was confronted by a surly old lady at the counter, she hated me, I could see the loathing and disgust in her dark beady eyes.  She told me single rooms were £65 for the night and grimaced as I took the crumpled notes from my pocket. I only had sixty and she wouldn’t accept it, not even if she waived the breakfast. Climbing back on the bike annoyed and angry, I went down to the beach and gazed out at the dying sun. Opening my bottle of vodka and my laptop I sat down and began working on both. Two hours later I had finished half the bottle, my laptop was almost out of juice, and I still had no Idea how I was going to get on that ferry. As I stared out into the blurry majestic ocean I suddenly realized the answer had been staring at me the whole time. Nearly the whole ten-mile stretch from here to Dover was lined with boats. All I had to do was borrow one. It’s not that far across the English Channel.

     I jumped up excited and swaying, climbed back on my bike, and wobbled down the dark road back toward Dover. I found a small twin-engine speed boat next to a shop called “Dover sea sports club”. Looking through the windows of the small building, I knew there would be a key inside - who ever owned the boat would be bound to keep a spare. Taking a scaffolding pole from the construction site next door,  I placed the end of it over the door handle and pushed with all of my body weight until the wooden door popped open. Cautiously I tiptoed inside, paranoid an alarm would go off.  I found the keys in the top drawer of a desk; this had been so easy that I actually laughed. Climbing back into the boat I tested the keys. The engines gave a brief stutter and I shut them off - This was definitely my ticket to France. I released the brake from the trailer and rolled it down into the cold water. Grabbing my bag I climbed inside.


Dover Sea Sports Center

     I was about an hour out to sea before the lights from the houses along the great shores of England were swallowed by darkness, I couldn’t see anything. I unpacked all my clothes, put them on to ward of the cold sea air and climbed into the cabin with the rest of the vodka. I sat there for ages drinking the liquid fire and playing with my cheap plastic lighter, watching the flames taunt the shadows in time to the gentle swaying of the boat. I started feeling sorry myself. - Its my own fault I’m a fugitive. Its my own fault my friends and family are in danger. It’s my own fault I’m stuck on this fucking boat heading out to mainland Europe to hide. Eventually, numb by the drink, I put my head down on my bag and fell asleep.
When I woke I had no idea what the time was, but the sun had climbed about half way up the blue cloudless sky. I couldn’t see any land but I could tell by the sun roughly which direction was south. I started the engines and set off into the unknown, hoping I hadn’t drifted to far.

     Eventually I saw land in the distance, the nation of France beckoning me closer. When I got to the shore I pulled hard on the throttle, accelerating towards the land. I hit a sand bank hard and the boat came right up on to the beach. I’ve done it! I’m here, and I’m a lot safer than I was yesterday! I walked for a while inland until I found a dusty dirt road and began trekking along it kicking up clouds of dirt. It wasn’t long before a local pulled up in a rusted pickup truck.
Quel partie de France sommes-nous?” I asked. He stared at me like I was insane.
Pouvez vous me conduire?” I offered, putting on my sweetest most innocent face. He pointed at the back of his truck and I climbed in amongst boxes of vegetables. We drove for about 45 minutes, driving through one village and stopping in the next, I think the roadsign read “Asnelles”. I thanked the driver and jumped out swinging my rucksack over my left shoulder. I started looking around the old town for somewhere that could change my £60 into Euros. Eventually I found the town library - walking inside and finding they had Internet access put a huge smile on my face.

     I’m about to set off for Paris, I just had a look at a French map and it seems Paris isn’t too far from Asnelles. Also, as people in the comments asked, I pulled a few pics from Google maps - one of Inside Dover port and one of the building where I found the boat. Congratulations if you made it through the whole post, I know it was quite long; I’m just excited to be here, and I find it very hard to be descriptive and brief at the same time. I'll try to keep them shorter in future. Anyway, take care and I’ll update when I can. x

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(Post 3) - Je vais en Paris

     I guess I’m not having any luck convincing you guys that my real life troubles are real but anyway... I’m Sat in an internet café right now opposite Pencester gardens in Dover. I made my mind up last night to head to Paris.  I think if I can get to Paris I will be able to bask in the wonderful loose liberal culture and sensibly evaluate exactly what I’m going to do.

     I stayed up quite late last night reading peoples blogs, and watched a crappy telesync version of the adjustment bureau. Woke up this morning and helped myself to one of those disgusting sachets of coffee from the little paper tubes. I had lit the last cigarette from my packet when someone pounded on the door, I presume it was the day manager realizing I wasn’t a paying customer.  I pushed the chair from the dresser up against the door handle, unlocked the window and climbed out, (leaving through windows is starting to become a habit).

     I waited in a layby on the A259, its quite a busy road so it didn’t take to long for someone to pull over. “Where are you headed” asked Chris, a barman from Newhaven. His eyes looking concerned and I knew he was safe. “Paris” I responded. He laughed and said he could take me as far as Folkestone. I got into the front seat and began to lie about how I was heading to my aunts chalet over in France. As I sat there, being driven towards uncertainty I gazed out of the window. All I could see were people engulfed in monotonous lives of mediocrity, worried about bills, debt and unfaithful spouses. I could see an invisible line where the tide of this once great empire had peaked before slowly drifting back out. This could possibly be the best thing that’s happened to me I thought. I am going to discover who I really am.

     The car pulled up and I got out and, Chris handed me a tenner with a genuine smile and wished me the best. I walked straight into town, into the nearest Tesco express. I’d been around Maya so long I knew what I needed to do. I bought a packet of tobacco, rizlas and four loaves of bread. I found a quiet area of town outside a charity shop and lurked outside, bag in one hand laptop in the other. Almost immediately a pensioner walked out, I bumped into her and dropped my bag; she apologized and bent down to help my pick up the bread that had fallen out. With one swift move I crouched down next to her, slipped my hand in to her open handbag and gently lifted out the purse, putting it down the back of my trousers. Hastily thanking her I left. £95 – I think Wednesday’s pension day. I took the money out and memorized the name and address from the driving license, - Yes of course I’ll send the money back one day.

    I spent £25 on a large rucksack, spent the next hour shoplifting clothes and makeup from Primark and New Look, and bought a medium sized bottle of vodka from a newsagent. I knew I had to get to Dover and scope it out while there was still some daylight. After walking through a maze of residential avenues trying car handles I saw the greatest thing I could see, parked on the pavement was a motorbike with the keys in, an old cruiser type bike with a full tank of petrol. I rode into Dover as the sun was getting low, hair flapping wildly behind me. I didn’t really think things through by stealing the bike as nearly every car started beeping at me for not wearing a helmet. I spotted this Internet café as I drove up to the Port. Security looks intense there, loads of underpaid men in high vis jackets, waiting for their next power trip.

    So now I’m going to ride back west, I saw a Bnb about 10 miles back which should be ideal for tonight, I’m saving pictures of Dover Port and Calais Port from google maps to my desktop right now and will spend tonight working out how I’m going to get on that boat. I hope the bnb has wifi, if not at least I have cigarettes and alcohol. If I don’t get arrested at the port I’ll try and let you guys know what happens tomorrow. x

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(Post 2) - No Destination

    Hey guys, thank you for the support, it means a lot just knowing somebody’s listening.  Now I know some of you had trouble believing the state of my life but I’m afraid that is the harsh reality of somebody evading an arrest warrant. Now to those of you who didn’t believe my last post your going to have trouble with what happened to me today, but ill post it anyway!

     I was woken this morning at about half 10 buy the sound of people outside the house, shuffling around like nervous school children outside the headmasters office. I knew who its was before they took the battering ram to the front door, the most disorganized conspicuous people on earth. They shouted  “police” in unison, their voices menacing with the air of desired authority. I didn’t wait around, I couldn’t. I hated having to leave Maya but I knew they would have caught her as she was sleeping in the lounge with no escape route. I grabbed my cigarettes and laptop from next to my bed and clambered straight out of the window, fortunately I had been leaving it ajar in case of scenarios like this. I ran for the road opposite, scarpered around the corner and double backed on a parallel road in time to see the bastards dragging Maya by the hair into the the back of their van, taking her away to lock in their squalid cages of democracy. I knew I had to leave, fast, and I couldn’t return to get my things, not even my precious guitar.

     I walked around all day staring at the pavement, laptop under one arm just thinking things over in my head. I have no idea what I’m going to do! Everybody I know is probably under surveillance, I have no money, no home and no one to turn to. But I’m not giving up, I’m not turning myself in! I pulled on random car door handles. It took maybe 40 or 50 till I found one that opened, a white ford sierra with cheesy McDonalds wrappers and a Prodigy CD on the passenger seat. I remembered what Maya did. – “twist the red wires together and touch the brown” I got the car started and went, the long road of anguish with no destination.

     I managed to get about 10 miles east of Hastings before the car ran out of petrol. Stranded on a coastal road I had no option but to abandon it and hitch hike. It took an hour for a car to stop. A friendly couple from Torquay picked me up and let me sit in the back of their spotless Honda on their cream leather seats. Christ, I realized that I must stink, I havn’t had a shower in days. They dropped me off near a Travel lodge not believing my story that I was lost and trying to find my aunts house, I walked through the automatic doors to be greeted by a young male behind the counter complete with acne, braces and a lustful look in his eyes. I lent on the counter and turned on the tears telling him I had been mugged and I just needed a bed for the night I had no where else to go. He insisted that I stay in one of the rooms, he said he was the senior manager and as long as I was out by lunch time it should be fine.

     So here I am in my free room, laptop is charging. I’m going to have a shower now, but where the hell do I go from here? I’m thinking I might try to leave the country, I guess I’ve gotta take one day at a time. x

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(Post 1) - First Blog

    My life is a mess right now, There is a warrant out for my arrest – a crime I’m not going to mention but suffice to say that if I’m caught I’m looking at a very long sentence. I currently have no job, very little money, and I’m living in Brighton in this wretched derelict house with a junkie, don’t get me wrong though Maya’s a lovely girl, very streetwise just not my Idea of an ideal housemate.  We obviously haven’t been paying any bills so our water supply has just been cut off, I think the electricity will be too within the next few days, I really hope that doesn’t happen.

     Anyway today was like any other over the past couple of weeks, woke up about ten thirty when the sun reached the holes in the lurid floral curtains, and made myself a cup of coffee with bottled water and the propane BBQ that now resides in the lounge. I shaved my legs in the toilet with an almost blunt razor… Now I know how that sounds but we have 2 toiles in our house one for using and one for washing, we need to conserve our drinking water because it is quite hard to steal.  So at about 2:30 We left the house through the downstairs window because all the doors have been barricaded from the inside, and went down to the local supermarket to steal breakfast, again.  Returned with our food, ate and sat down to play guitar for a while. Well I played guitar while Maya sang, which is ok as she is actually a pretty good singer.

     Around 9PM Maya decides she needs to score, whatever she must have taken this morning is wearing off and she’s getting the shakes, Christ knows where she stole the money to pay for this, so we pick up a bottle of cooking oil and off we go.
We only need to pull about 15 cars before we find one that opens, a black corsa with a 98 plate - old cars are the easiest. Maya started the car by touching two red wires together then touching them to a brown wire, and drove erratically over to Eastbourne to meet the dealer. She gave him a call when we were opposite the usual phonebox and he appeared from the darkness at the car window, handing Maya a very small package of very expensive brown powder.

     We got back near to the house and Maya covered the interior of the car in the oil to get rid of any prints and hide most of the DNA, we get home, she cooks up her stuff in a teaspoon and sucks it up into a syringe using one of my cigarette butts to filter it. Now I don’t really mind heroin use, I have smoked it from time to time I just don’t like the whole nodding in and out of consciousness.  Maya’s passed out in the lounge, and I rolled myself a joint ,fired up my laptop and sat down to write this.
It feels good to actually write down what my life is like at the moment even if it is just self-therapy. Anyway I’ll try and write another blog tomorrow if we still have power, It will probably be exactly the same as this though! X

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